diff --git a/tstest/integration/vms/udp_tester.go b/tstest/integration/vms/udp_tester.go
deleted file mode 100644
index cd04ba5fa..000000000
--- a/tstest/integration/vms/udp_tester.go
+++ /dev/null
@@ -1,80 +0,0 @@
-// Copyright (c) 2021 Tailscale Inc & AUTHORS All rights reserved.
-// Use of this source code is governed by a BSD-style
-// license that can be found in the LICENSE file.
-
-// +build ignore
-
-// Command udp_tester exists because all of these distros being tested don't
-// have a consistent tool for doing UDP traffic. This is a very hacked up tool
-// that does that UDP traffic so these tests can be done.
-package main
-
-import (
-	"flag"
-	"fmt"
-	"io"
-	"log"
-	"net"
-	"os"
-)
-
-var (
-	client = flag.String("client", "", "host:port to connect to for sending UDP")
-	server = flag.String("server", "", "host:port to bind to for receiving UDP")
-)
-
-func main() {
-	flag.Parse()
-
-	if *client == "" && *server == "" {
-		log.Fatal("specify -client or -server")
-	}
-
-	if *client != "" {
-		conn, err := net.Dial("udp", *client)
-		if err != nil {
-			log.Fatalf("can't dial %s: %v", *client, err)
-		}
-		log.Printf("dialed to %s", conn.RemoteAddr())
-		defer conn.Close()
-
-		buf := make([]byte, 1024)
-		n, err := os.Stdin.Read(buf)
-		if err != nil && err != io.EOF {
-			log.Fatalf("can't read from stdin: %v", err)
-		}
-
-		nn, err := conn.Write(buf[:n])
-		if err != nil {
-			log.Fatalf("can't write to %s: %v", conn.RemoteAddr(), err)
-		}
-
-		if n != nn {
-			log.Fatalf("wanted to write %d bytes, wrote %d bytes", n, nn)
-		}
-	}
-
-	if *server != "" {
-		addr, err := net.ResolveUDPAddr("udp", *server)
-		if err != nil {
-			log.Fatalf("can't resolve %s: %v", *server, err)
-		}
-		ln, err := net.ListenUDP("udp", addr)
-		if err != nil {
-			log.Fatalf("can't listen %s: %v", *server, err)
-		}
-		defer ln.Close()
-
-		buf := make([]byte, 1024)
-
-		n, _, err := ln.ReadFromUDP(buf)
-		if err != nil {
-			log.Fatal(err)
-		}
-		if n == 0 {
-			log.Fatal("got nothing")
-		}
-
-		fmt.Print(string(buf[:n]))
-	}
-}
diff --git a/tstest/integration/vms/vms_test.go b/tstest/integration/vms/vms_test.go
index 385ffb669..911222418 100644
--- a/tstest/integration/vms/vms_test.go
+++ b/tstest/integration/vms/vms_test.go
@@ -859,122 +859,6 @@ func (h Harness) testDistro(t *testing.T, d Distro, ipm ipMapping) {
 			t.Fatalf("wanted reported ip to be %q, got: %q", string(ipBytes), string(testIPBytes))
 		}
 	})
-
-	t.Run("outgoing-udp-ipv4", func(t *testing.T) {
-		cwd, err := os.Getwd()
-		if err != nil {
-			t.Fatalf("can't get working directory: %v", err)
-		}
-		dir := t.TempDir()
-		run(t, cwd, "go", "build", "-o", filepath.Join(dir, "udp_tester"), "./udp_tester.go")
-
-		sftpCli, err := sftp.NewClient(cli)
-		if err != nil {
-			t.Fatalf("can't connect over sftp to copy binaries: %v", err)
-		}
-		defer sftpCli.Close()
-
-		copyFile(t, sftpCli, filepath.Join(dir, "udp_tester"), "/udp_tester")
-
-		uaddr, err := net.ResolveUDPAddr("udp", net.JoinHostPort("::", "0"))
-		if err != nil {
-			t.Fatalf("can't resolve udp listener addr: %v", err)
-		}
-
-		buf := make([]byte, 1024)
-
-		ln, err := net.ListenUDP("udp", uaddr)
-		if err != nil {
-			t.Fatalf("can't listen for UDP traffic: %v", err)
-		}
-		defer ln.Close()
-
-		sess, err := cli.NewSession()
-		if err != nil {
-			t.Fatalf("can't open session: %v", err)
-		}
-		defer sess.Close()
-
-		sess.Stdin = strings.NewReader("hi")
-		sess.Stdout = logger.FuncWriter(t.Logf)
-		sess.Stderr = logger.FuncWriter(t.Logf)
-
-		_, port, _ := net.SplitHostPort(ln.LocalAddr().String())
-
-		go func() {
-			cmd := fmt.Sprintf("/udp_tester -client %s\n", net.JoinHostPort("100.64.0.1", port))
-			time.Sleep(10 * time.Millisecond)
-			t.Logf("sending packet: %s", cmd)
-			err := sess.Run(cmd)
-			if err != nil {
-				t.Errorf("can't send UDP packet: %v", err)
-			}
-		}()
-
-		t.Log("listening for packet")
-		n, _, err := ln.ReadFromUDP(buf)
-		if err != nil {
-			t.Fatal(err)
-		}
-
-		if n == 0 {
-			t.Fatal("got nothing")
-		}
-
-		if !bytes.Contains(buf, []byte("hi")) {
-			t.Fatal("did not get UDP message")
-		}
-	})
-
-	t.Run("incoming-udp-ipv4", func(t *testing.T) {
-		// vms_test.go:947: can't dial: socks connect udp 127.0.0.1:36497->100.64.0.2:33409: network not implemented
-		t.Skip("can't make outgoing sockets over UDP with our socks server")
-
-		sess, err := cli.NewSession()
-		if err != nil {
-			t.Fatalf("can't open session: %v", err)
-		}
-		defer sess.Close()
-
-		ip, err := sess.Output("tailscale ip -4")
-		if err != nil {
-			t.Fatalf("can't nab ipv4 address: %v", err)
-		}
-
-		port, err := getProbablyFreePortNumber()
-		if err != nil {
-			t.Fatalf("unable to fetch port number: %v", err)
-		}
-
-		go func() {
-			time.Sleep(10 * time.Millisecond)
-
-			conn, err := h.testerDialer.Dial("udp", net.JoinHostPort(string(bytes.TrimSpace(ip)), strconv.Itoa(port)))
-			if err != nil {
-				t.Errorf("can't dial: %v", err)
-			}
-
-			fmt.Fprint(conn, securePassword)
-		}()
-
-		sess, err = cli.NewSession()
-		if err != nil {
-			t.Fatalf("can't open session: %v", err)
-		}
-		defer sess.Close()
-		sess.Stderr = logger.FuncWriter(t.Logf)
-
-		msg, err := sess.Output(
-			fmt.Sprintf(
-				"/udp_tester -server %s",
-				net.JoinHostPort(string(bytes.TrimSpace(ip)), strconv.Itoa(port)),
-			),
-		)
-
-		if msg := string(bytes.TrimSpace(msg)); msg != securePassword {
-			t.Fatalf("wanted %q from vm, got: %q", securePassword, msg)
-		}
-	})
 }
 
 func runTestCommands(t *testing.T, timeout time.Duration, cli *ssh.Client, batch []expect.Batcher) {